“Never feel bad for being assertive, speaking your mind, and putting your foot down. What you think is anger, others see as a good solid display of self-esteem. ” – Alison James
This guest post from our Assertiveness & Confidence Building trainer Sophie explains how assertiveness leads to improved self-confidence. The full 2-day workshop covers techniques for confidence building and boosting self esteem.
Positive communication
It is important to note that being assertive is not about being aggressive.
Assertiveness is a form of positive communication that can be learnt and applied to all areas of your life. It is the skill of knowing and defending your rights but at the same time understanding that others have rights too.
When someone is asserting themselves their primary focus should be on reaching a joint solution, which meets the needs of both people involved. In other words ‘I’m OK and you’re OK’. It is not about getting angry or making someone bow to your demands. This type of aggressive communication is manipulative and threatening and not at all considerate of other people. Equally other non-assertive ways to communicate include passive and passive-aggressive behaviours. Read the rest of "How Being Assertive Leads to Greater Self-Confidence"
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Posted by Guest Author in Assertiveness Training, Management Skills Training on February 10th, 2012 | No Comments »
by Sanjay.B on Flickr
A study by american psychologists claims that simply behaving in a bold manner can make you happy. Their research supports the idea that any extrovert behaviour has a positive impact on your mood. This research is documented in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
You can develop your assertiveness skills on our public assertiveness training courses in Brighton, Sussex.
“I don’t think it’s the only way to find happiness, but I do think it’s a neglected way,” said Associate Professor Will Fleeson, a psychologist at Wake Forest University led the study claims that although it is not the only answer to finding happiness it is a much neglected way of achieving a good self image and a positive feeling, saying “People too often look outside themselves for things to make them happy.”
There were 50 students involved in the study. They recorded answers to set questions on palmtops for up to 10 weeks, recording their moods and activities. Bold or outgoing activities such as singing aloud, freestyle dancing, and plucking up the courage to approach someone they found attractive boosted the mood of the student for some time after the event or action.
Professor Fleeson remarked that: “Every single student in the study was happier when he or she acted extroverted than when he or she acted introverted…Even introverts can act extroverted and become happier by changing their behaviour.”
So whether you are alone or in company making a concious effort to be more extrovert, singing in the car or shower, dancing to some music or approaching others to initiate conversation can make you feel happy. Activities such as climbing mountains or going for a brisk walk can have a positive effect. Practice being more talkative or more assertive, voice your opinion or ask more a questions.
Fleeson promotes the idea that your happiness is ultimately in your own hands, it comes from the inside not from the outside. It’s up to you to choose to become more outgoing, even if you are reserved and shy by nature you can work on this little by little by choosing to practice some of the things mentioned above. Be a little more assertive, adventurous, outgoing etc – you have the power to be happy.
A range of techniques for improving your assertiveness are covered on our 2-day Assertiveness & Confidence Building training course
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Posted by Heather Buckley in Assertiveness Training on October 9th, 2007 | 4 Comments »
