Home » Blog » Management and Leadership » Techniques for Managers: 3 Simple Steps to Reach Objective Solutions

One of the hardest things about being a manager is managing yourself. Over 140 delegates per year come through our public Management Skills for New Managers training course here in Brighton, and before we teach them about managing a team we first cover a range of techniques for managing yourself .

One thing we’re often told by attendees is that they find it easier to give advice to other people than to think about their own approach to problem solving and to give themselves advice.

This short article describes a simple but highly effective 3-step process to reaching objective solutions for yourself. Visit our Free Resources section for a range of other Management Skills Resources and Leadership Resources

What Advice Would You Give?

To quote Albert Einstein, “You can’t solve a problem with the same mindset that created it.” We all know what it feels like to give others good advice, but when it comes to giving ourselves advice it doesn’t seem to be as simple. It can be difficult at times to employ clear thinking when we are so personally involved. Especially in emotionally charged situations such as dealing with personality clashes, handling conflict and managing stress. However, I believe that people do have the resources within them to meet their own needs – it’s just a matter of accessing them.

It used to be said that talking to ourselves is the first sign of insanity. Now however, it is used as an effective self-management tool known as ‘Imaginary Dialogue’. We all talk to ourselves, we all answer ourselves; and from time to time we all argue with ourselves too. The type of relationship we have with ourselves affect the type of relationships we have with others and the world in general. If we want to be good at managing others, then we need to lead by example and be good at managing ourselves.

Follow this simple process in giving yourself objective advice and support for the next 21 days and you will be amazed. You will feel more supported, you will be less stressed, and, because you’ll be so level-headed, you’ll be able to effectively manage sensitive situations. Once we have learned how to truly be there for ourselves, we then can help others to do the same.

How to do it

Use the following 3 simple steps to objectively reach your own solutions or help others to do the same. The process can be used repeatedly with every ‘yes, but….’ answer preventing you from achieving your goal. In order for this technique to be effective, it is a good idea to get into role and step outside of yourself, so that the problems you are having are momentarily not yours. Really try to act as though you are giving advice to someone else instead of yourself. This may take practice but it does get easier.

Step 1. What advice would you give to a colleague if they came to you with the same issue, concern, problem as you have yourself? Remember, this advice is not for yourself.

Step 2. What is stopping you from taking your own advice? Identify your personal obstacles.

Step 3. What advice would you give to a colleague if they came to you with the same obstacle/s? Imagine a colleague has come to you with the same obstacle/s you identified in question two. What advice would you give them now?

Be honest. Think about, write or talk about your answer/s. Step 2 and 3 can be repeated until you get to the heart of the matter with a personal step by step action plan. For example:

Step 1. Be assertive and tell him how you feel.

Step 2. What’s the point, he won’t listen.

Step 3. How will you know if you don’t try? Give it a go.

Step 2. Yes, but what if he tells me I’m being too sensitive.

Step 3. It’s OK to feel the way you feel. Be specific and explain the situation.

Step 2. Yes, but what if I get flustered and forget everything.

Step 3. Plan and rehearse what you are going to say.

Using this technique

This transformational technique can be used with anyone, at anytime and on any given subject. Depending on the situation you may choose to substitute “What advice would you give to a colleague…” with “What advice would you give to your best friend…” or “What advice would you give to your child…” This can be really powerful in helping yourself and others answer from a position of care. Use the What Advice Would You Give technique to empower individuals or teams, to use their initiative, deal with difficult situations and build confidence. Remember the more we help others to manage themselves, the less we need to manage them.

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Management Skills Training, Management Tips, Objective Decisions, Problem Solving, Techniques for Managers, Tips, top tips

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This entry was posted by Alistair Wylie on Tuesday, November 17th, 2009 at 3:36 pm and is filed under Management and Leadership, New Free Resources, Personal Development. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.